Thursday 12/25/2003 5:05:21pm Name: Joe E-Mail: mnetwebh@hotmail.com Homepage Title: Gamephasma.com - SWG Resource Homepage URL: http://www.gamephasma.com/ Referred By: Search Engine Location: USA Comments: I hope you don't mind me saying this, but you've got a cool site here.

Tuesday 07/22/2003 1:35:18am Name: Lars-Göran Josefsson E-Mail: jonas.josefsson@mbox301.swipnet.se Homepage Title: BRBEATZ bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Homepage URL: http://!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Referred By: Search Engine Location: Real BRbeatz lair Comments: I told you before, I'd rather not have people see your bullshit email address in connection with my actual established site containing real music. If you even update your weak ass site anymore, remove the text brbeatz@ihavepms.com that you were too retarded to make into an email link. If not I will clog up your guestbook with more annoying text for the rest of your life. As a matter of fact, in order to be even more annoying, I searched the net for professionally created irritating rants. Here's one that you'll enjoy: "Calm down, Moby. I'm not talking about the cornucopia of porn available on the web. I'm talking about the complete and total dickwads who construct pages in the lamest and most broken fashion, all the while thinking they're hot shit. Before I go any further with this rant, lets get some things clear. This page sucks. Notice as you read it you're forced to lean closer to the monitor. That's the incredible suck of this page pulling you in, from across the great expanse of the internet. Why does it suck? Because it's ugly, disjointed, and if you're particularly looped, it's probably hard to navigate too. Lest someone send me a scathing email saying "Those who are constrained to domicile within structures of potent frangibility should in no account employ petreous formations as projectiles." I'll point out that the stuff I'm complaining about isn't present on this page. It sucks on it's own distinct merits. So what exactly is my peeve? There's a few. Here's one: JavaScript. Does this actually have some sort of functional use beyond the same old boring and retarded shit people do with it, such as mouse rollovers, seconds until some fantastic event, what time it is you're viewing the page, that fucking annoying background color pulse thing, the shit where you make annoying sprites trail the mouse, stupid popups that welcome you to a page, anything involving stopping the status bar in the browser from displaying any sort of useful information, those stupid "select an item from a listbox and go there right away" link things or the ever popular ad popup? About the only thing that comes to mind is cookies. The two big things you do with JavaScript is put it into your page wrong, or put it into your page for no good reason. For me, it's a toss up as to which of these is more annoying. Am I more annoyed when I can't view someone's site because javascript error boxes keep popping up, or am I more annoyed when I'm forced to watch the same cliche' shit on 10 sites in a row? Actually, it's neither. Since JavaScript is so useless and nobody ever does anything of value with it, I have it turned off in all my browsers. So what pisses me off the most is a page where I must enable it to navigate because for some reason the concept of a hyperlink was lost on someone. 9 times out of 10, when this occurs I just leave. Seems to me, this sort of shit isn't neccesary. Browsers have tags specifically to tell you when javascript isn't available. Is it that fucking difficult to put something in there that includes those extra links? Maybe at the bare minimum some text that says "I was written by a brain damanged idiot who doesn't know how to use the tag, so you can't actually follow any links. Please turn on JavaScript, bend over and grab your ankles, and everything will be fine.". A far worse combination is when someone who's new to HTML (or god forbid, just thinks that sort of thing is cool) discovers JavaScript, goes to one of the many standard repositories for cliche scripts, downloads about 10 of them, and uses them all. The sort of intellect that thinks this is a good idea can't even install the shit correctly half the time. Even when the instructions say "Paste these lines directly into your PAGE to add a clock", it gets done wrong. Trust me, I've personally seen this happen many times. Another thing that pisses me off: Patently Broken Pages. By this, I mean someone churning out some web page that ends up so pathetically broken, you have to wonder if the person who mhde the damn thing was blind or something. Some classic examples of this: Links that link to a stupidly broken URL, like http://http://www.nurdz.com. Links where the trailing is left off, causing the next 3 paragraphs of the page to be hyperlinked. Links to in-site pages that would work if the proper extension had been put on the link (like say .html instead of .htm or something). Entire pages that are full scale headlines due to the lack of a tag. Inline images that appear to be broken because, again, the file is there but with a slightly different name (often a problem with case sensitivity). Pages that only work in one browser. What in the living hell is up with that? It's possible to make pages that are good looking and work in more than one browser; I've done it (not that you could tell by this particular site). A page that only works in one browser isn't even trying. I could go on, but you get the idea. All of these things are annoying as fucking hell. How does this slip past you as a web designer? How can you POSSIBLY make one of these mistakes and not notice it before you publish?!?! I'll tell you how. You're either blind, retarded, or have the intellect of a field mouse. I can only presume these idiots just bang their faces on the keyboard for a while, stop to mop up the slobber running down their chin, and then somehow manage to upload it without knowing what upload means, how a web server works, or what day of the week it is. Or perhaps you're one of the people that think that HTML is a programming language, and that by making a web page, you're "programming the web". Let me clue you in on something. HTML stands for Hypertext Markup Language. You know what markup means? It means "detailed stylistic instructions for typesetting something". That means, "Hey web browser, when you display this stuff that I've typed into this file, would you please make sure that everything wrapped in is bold, pretty please?". Do you know what programmer means? It means "One who writes computer programs". Does it take a huge mental genius and a big mental spark to realize that these two things are vastly different and not at all related? Obviously. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Update! I got email from someone who I shall refer to as Pancreas. Sure, that's a wack thing to call someone. On the other hand, all I'm really tryigg to prhtect him from is people who don't know who he is. Anyone who knows who he is, knows me, and will know who I mean just by my saying that. Don't get mad that they know the story and you don't, they got to hear it firsthand already anyway. But anyway, he said "Hey, if you're going to complain, you should check your spelling". This isn't really a quote, but a paraphrase, since I deleted the mail. As it happens my keyboard doesn't have a paraphrase mark button on it, so that will have to do. Readers should carefully check the list of things I mentioned above and see if I say anywhere that people constantly spell things wrong. Anyone who spell checks his web page is probably a prat anyways. Spelling mistakes are hard to notice because your brain works so hard to fill in the that people left out (yes, that one was intentional). Besides which, even big fancy companies like Fisher & Paykel(who make some really neat crap) seem to think that my country is "Candada". And so, I could care less about spelling, in a general sense. Making ugly pages with stupid content-> That's fine. Making a page that obviously doesn't look like you intended but you're too stupid to notice it-> Brain Damaged. (The preceeding paragraph was more funny before Fisher & Paykel realized that they spelled Canada wrong and fixed it.)" --quoted from some nerd like you-- sorry it took me longer than 2 weeks, talk to you agin tomorrow.

Tuesday 04/08/2003 7:01:44am Name: Lizbeth E-Mail: lizbeth@cuteandsingle.com Homepage Title: cuteandsingle.com Homepage URL: http://cuteandsingle.com Referred By: Search Engine Location: Bend, Oregon Comments: Splendid work. I appreciate your site.

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