"My father was a beekeeper before me, his father was a beekeeper. I want to follow in their footsteps. And their footsteps were like this. (Runs screaming) AAAAAAAH! I'm covered in beeeeees! -Eddie Izzard"
"If Jesus was a Jew, how come he has a Mexican first name? -Billy Connolly"
"I don't care what is written about me so long as it isn't true. -Dorothy Parker"
"You get what anyone gets. You get a lifetime. No more. No less. You got a lifetime. -Neil Gaiman"
"What you have here is an example of that well known phenomenon, A Bookshop Assistant Who Knows Buggerall But Won't Admit It (probably some kind of arts graduate). -Terry Pratchett"
"Every now and then when your life gets complicated and the weasels start closing in, the only real cure is to load up on heinous chemicals and then drive like a bastard from Hollywood to Las Vegas. Just roll the roof back and screw it on, grease the face with white tanning butter and move out with the music at top volume, and at least a pint of ether. -From the book Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas by Hunter S. Thompson "
"By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest. Confucius"
"Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart ... Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside awakens. Carl Gustav Jung"
"Damaged people are dangerous, they know they can survive. When we lose the right to be different, we lose the privilege to be free. Charles Evans Hughes"
"By the pricking of my thumbs,Something wicked this way comes. -Shakespeare, Macbeth"
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